Wives on Duty
/Wives on Duty
Before I met Allison Uribe, I came across her book, Cuffs and Coffee: A Devotional for Wives of America's Law Enforcement Officers. When we met in 2019 at a conference in Ohio where we were both speaking, I realized that Allison was not only a lot of fun but that she had grit. She will fess up to not handling situations the best way possible early on in her relationship and that she and her husband haven’t always had smooth sailing in their marriage. What saved her relationship was when she started walking her “faith walk.” She realized she needed to behave differently in her marriage and when she turned to faith, it impacted her and then her husband. Today Allison shares her story of struggle and how faith changed her and now allows her to impact many others in law enforcement as a Chaplain in San Antonio.
(04:28): Allison shares her story about her marriage falling apart due to the impact of the career and not understanding the impact as a spouse.
“He's not a banker, he is not a real estate agent. Hey, he is a police officer. It's just different. It's different.” Allison Uribe
(07:05): Turning to faith helped repair Allison’s marriage because her mindset was “there’s no place to look but up.”
(08:21): Allison started Wives on Duty for other law enforcement spouses to not feel alone when struggling in their relationships.
(10:31): Wives on Duty went from one participant to a national organization which eventually led Allison into Chaplaincy.
(12:17): Allison wrote Cuffs and Coffee and started speaking at events. Those opportunities led Allison back to the San Antonio Police Department, where she works with spouses and children, starting at the academy level.
(15:50): Allison talks about the catalyst moment when she knew she needed to change to save her marriage.
(17:14): ”I was starting to see the things I really wanted from him had to begin with me.”
Allison Uribe talks about hardships in her law enforcement relationship and how walking her “faith walk” saved her marriage.
(18:47): Allison gets baptized at her church and discusses that having her husband present during the ceremony was what started his journey in faith.
(20:12): With both Allison and her husband attending church, their relationship evolved into one that was faith based where they were both able to love the hard parts of marriage and forgive.
(23:11): In a relationship, a single person has the power to make a significant impact.
“If one of you doesn't start, then you're not going to be heard. There's not going to be movement, there's not going to be change, and many times we have to be that change.” -Cyndi Doyle
(26:12): Service to each other as partners matters greatly.
(27:48): In the law enforcement profession, you have to believe in something bigger than yourself, not just on the street, but in your home, in your marriage, in your relationships with your children, and in any relationship you have.
(29:49): It's an everyday decision to choose to love and trust your partner. As an officer, you wouldn’t go to the chief’s office and put your badge down and say this isn’t working out. The same mindset applies to your wedding ring.
“This badge that you have on your chest is for a season, but that ring on your finger, that's a lifetime.” – Allison Uribe
(31:06): Healthy officers on the street start with healthy officers in the home.
(34:15): Allison shares why the revision in her book, Because I’m Suitable was so important.
(40:21): Allison talks about Wives on Duty and Kids on Duty and how she ministers.
(47:54): Pieces of advice that Allison offers are don’t try and fit a mold. Remember that you don't have to be a statistic of divorce. “Choose your heart correctly and have grace with yourself, because you're not going to get it perfect every time. You're not going to parent, right every time. You're not always going to be able to contain your tongue whenever you're arguing. The beautiful thing about hiccups and hardships is the power that comes with them and the power of “I love you.”
“Realize that we're not fighting with our spouse, we're fighting for them.” - Allison Uribe
Allison Uribe is a Chaplain, conference, and retreat speaker, and author. In 2008, she and her husband, a San Antonio, Texas, police officer, founded Wives on Duty Ministries with a mission to support, encourage, and inspire the spouses of first responders through God's word. In 2022, she founded Kids on Duty Ministries which supports children of law enforcement officers. She currently serves as a San Antonio Police Department Family Chaplain. Allison is an ordained minister and travels to many churches preaching the word of God throughout the U.S. Allison has authored two books, Because I'm Suitable and Cuffs and Coffee: A Devotional for Wives of America's Law Enforcement Officers.