Heroes Don't Do it Alone

Cyndi’s work is so important that every deputy that comes to work for me receives a copy of her book, Hold the Line.

I’ve had deputies return to share that her insights and strategies have saved their marriage and created deeper connections with their families.

As a LEO spouse, she speaks to our profession with authenticity because she’s living the life right alongside us. I take every chance I can get to learn from Cyndi!

-Garret Teslaa, Host: ‘The Squad Room Podcast’

You got into the job because you felt there was a calling. 

You probably said you wanted to help people. 

You didn’t realize that you were not the only one committing to the career: your spouse and family are in this with you. 

Burnout, stress, the impact of shifts and training, and the chronic exposure to incidents no human should see all spills over.

They have told you they see a difference in you: you aren’t as engaged, you have reacted larger than you meant to about little things, sometimes, you are just checked out. 

You want your spouse and family to get the best of you, but instead, they get the worst. Not on purpose; that is just the way it works.

You turn it on for work and the exhaustion hits when you get home. 

You are tired of the complaints and nagging. You want to feel connected and stay connected to your spouse and family. 

You can! I’ll explain how.

The first step is to understand the impact. The job impacts your brain as it accommodates what you must do day in and day out. Compartmentalizing scenes, hypervigilance, and disconnecting from emotions are all a part of what keeps you safe and able to do the job. It doesn’t turn off just because you leave the job. Your training comes home with you and impacts your mental and relational health. Once you understand WHAT is happening, you can change the outcome. 

Relationships are the greatest armor to the impact of the career. 

Let’s get you connected to Code4!

What Officers Need to Know

What Keeps You Safe Spills Over

Skills like the OODA Loop and Command Presence don’t turn off just because you are off duty. Given the right situation, they show up when you are with your spouse or family and get misinterpreted. They don’t understand how your brain has been trained.

It All Piles Up

You are not designed to see the things you see and scenes pile up in your subconscious. Just like ingesting small drops of poison every day, your body adjusts, but it’s impacted, resulting in behavioral or personality changes. Left unaddressed, it can lead to mental health issues, PTSD, and suicidal thoughts. Listen to your partner and family if they say they see a change in you.

What Goes Up Must Come Down

Your family does not get the best version of you. You are hypervigilant at work, and when you get home, your brain has to recover, which leads to fuzzy thinking, disengagement, and higher emotional reactions to little things.

Decompress but Don't Give In

Take 20-30 minutes to decompress after you get home but only after you acknowledge your loved ones. It’s tempting to give into disconnecting and numbing. Instead, find small ways to engage with your family or environment for better resilience.

Relationships are a Safety Issue!

According to research, officers with happy and stable homelives are safer on the job and more resilient. Help your spouse and family to understand your world and work to understand theirs.

Want More Information?

Train the officers

How it Works

By using her therapeutic experience in mental health, trauma, and relationships, specialized training from the Gottman Institute, along with certifications with Brene Brown as a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator, Cyndi hosts classes and workshops online or in person utilizing research-based information and personal experience to help you understand the impact from the field and training, improve your mental and relational health, and thrive now and in retirement.

Learn, implement & grow

What to Expect

You can expect to learn new ways to have a stronger and more productive department.  The tools and various resources that will be available to implement will make stronger, healthier bonds both professionally and personally. 

My gift to you is the free workbook ($27 value)

70 pages of tools for you to use that includes:

Podcast Episodes that Might Interest You

Perfect for LEO couples and their therapists!

"As a licensed therapist I am always on the look out for books that I can share with my clients.; books that resonate with them, but also provide important skills and/or validation in a format that non-clinicians can appreciate. This is one of those books. I have used this in session as a teaching guide (both law enforcement and non law enforcement clients) and had clients read it on their own (and with their partners) as a means of discussion. Cyndi Doyle has accomplished the ultimate in our field. She has written a book that both professionals and clients can utilize and enjoy alike."
Brandy Stiles
Licensed Therapist, Reviewed on Amazon